Nanny Wars: The Battle of Bumps and Curves

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[The setting is the bustling kitchen of a large, somewhat chaotic household in a little town in Poland. Roman is trying to wrangle the five children at the breakfast table as Lyudmila enters, followed by Veronica, the new nanny. Veronica is dressed in a stylish, albeit somewhat revealing, outfit.]

LYUDMILA: (frowning at Veronica) Veronica, this is a family home, not a nightclub. What on earth are you wearing?

VERONICA: (smiling innocently) Oh, this old thing? I just wanted to make a good impression on my first day. Comfort is key when chasing after little ones, don't you think?

LYUDMILA: (irritated) Comfort? That dress is shorter than a summer in Iceland! And that neckline plunges deeper than the Mariana Trench!

VERONICA: (teasingly) Well, Lyudmila, I suppose I could wrap myself in a tent like some people, but I prefer a bit of fresh air. Besides, it's not like I'm the one trying to smuggle a beach ball under my shirt.

LYUDMILA: (hands on her pregnant belly) This 'beach ball' happens to be your future employer. Show some respect!

VERONICA: (chuckling) Oh, I do respect nature's miracles. It's just that your belly looks like it's about to pop and launch into orbit any second now.

LYUDMILA: (huffing) My body is doing what it's supposed to do. It's a beautiful thing.

VERONICA: (playfully) Absolutely! It's like a majestic whale gracefully navigating the vast ocean of your maternity dress.

LYUDMILA: (turning red) You have no right—

VERONICA: (continuing) And speaking of nature's miracles, it's amazing how your body prepares for motherhood. Your breasts have become like twin peaks, ready to erupt with the flow of maternal love.

LYUDMILA: (clutching her chest) Veronica!

VERONICA: (giggling) I mean, they could have their own gravitational pull at this point. It's like watching a live demonstration of the Big Bang Theory.

LYUDMILA: (seething) You are pushing your luck, young lady.

VERONICA: (nodding at Lyudmila's hips) And let's not forget the grand expansion. Your hips are like the welcoming arms of Mother Earth herself, embracing life's abundance.

LYUDMILA: (suddenly feeling a wet sensation) Oh no...

[Lyudmila looks down to see that her irritation has caused her breast milk to leak through her blouse. The children at the table start to giggle, and Roman tries to suppress a smile.]

ROMAN: (attempting to mediate) Ladies, please, let's remember we're all here for the children.

VERONICA: (apologetically) You're right, Roman. I'm sorry, Lyudmila. I was just having a bit of fun. You're doing something incredible, and I truly admire that.

LYUDMILA: (calming down) Well, I suppose I may have overreacted about the dress. It's just... with the baby coming, I'm feeling a bit sensitive.

VERONICA: (offering a handkerchief) Here, let me help with that. And how about I wear something a bit more... conservative tomorrow?

LYUDMILA: (accepting the handkerchief) Thank you, Veronica. And maybe I can lend you one of my pre-pregnancy dresses. They're quite... roomy.

[They share a knowing smile, and the tension in the room dissipates as the family continues their morning routine, a little more harmoniously.]

Prompt

Write a dialogue for a comedy: Story in littletown of Poland. Nanny Veronicais non-pregnant, and she comes to work for a large family. Roman and Lyudmila, her employers, are already expecting their sixth child. Blonde Lyudmila is heavily pregnant with a huge belly. Lyudmila is a quarrelsome woman. She was very happy when, due to pregnancy, her breasts doubled in size due to the arrival of milk. But Veronica still has larger breasts, even without pregnancy, which caused Lyudmila great anger. Lyudmila is indignant at Veronica's deep neckline and short dress for a nanny. In response, Veronica begins to make fun of Lyudmila’s huge pregnant belly, her breasts filled with milk and her plump buttocks. Come up with three theses from Veronica about Lyudmila’s pregnant belly, one thesis about the very fact of Lyudmila’s pregnancy, three theses about Lyudmila’s mother’s breasts enlarging from breast milk, and one thesis about the expansion of Lyudmila’s hips. Because of anger, Lyudmila’s breast milk first leaks.

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